Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day!!!

Foods I Vowed Never To Eat

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Remember when you were growing up and your mom would cook foods you absolutely detested?  Not a commentary on her cooking, more of a commentary on my taste buds.  No cook, gourmet or otherwise, could find a redeeming quality in these selections.  I hated vegetables.  It didn’t matter what type - lima beans, green beans, kidney beans, black-eyed peas – not allowed to get up until the plate was clean, any type of vegetable literally kept me at the dinner table for hours.  I was positive that my mom was putting me through some kind of punishment every time she put one of the offending items on my dinner plate.

As I grew into my teen years, I learned the imagination, in the form of a condiment, could make a flavor combination for almost any taste. Green beans were doused in French dressing.  Black-eyed peas were hidden beneath layers of ketchup – anything to mask the flavor and make the food at least digestible.    

Vegetables were not the only foods on my “no” list.  Various pork parts, veal, any type of meat other than your standard chicken or beef sent my stomach swirling.  The problem was deciding what to eat or not to eat was not an option in our household.  I vowed right then and there, when I grew up, certain foods would never make it to my dinner table.

It took a while, well into my adult years, before I learned to like a few vegetables.  Broccoli, string beans without the dressing, even Brussels sprouts have been known to grace my dinner table.  I will confess, however, there are still certain foods that my children have not had the pleasure of experiencing at our dinner table.  Vegetables such as lima beans and black-eyed peas have never stepped foot in my house and animal parts are still limited to a select few.

While I should feel guilty, I think the list of forbidden food is a rite of passage as we grow up and determine what foods we are willing to digest in the name of healthy eating.  My kids may not taste a lima bean in my house, but I make sure they get all of the spinach, broccoli and corn they can digest. I’m sure as they grow, they too will have the list of forbidden foods.

Labeling Your Child

One of the lessons that we try to teach our children is to play nice at with other children, don’t be a bully or call other kids names.  How often, however, do we listen to our own advice?  When we get mad at our kids, how often do we call them names or put them down.

 “How could you spill the milk, what are you stupid?”

 “You get on my nerves.”

  “With grades like that, you’ll never be anything but a clerk in grocery store.  Paper or plastic?”

“You’re retarded.”

Names and derogatory comments hurt.  Not only do they hurt, but they can have a negative impact on the future success of your child.  Tell them they are stupid enough times, they will grow up believing that they can’t accomplish anything.  Tell them they might as well learn a trade because they are not smart enough for anything else – stand back and watch your words come back to fruition.  Are you so determined to alter your child’s life for an “I told you so moment?”   The words we use can shape a child’s entire future.

Encourage your child and lead them to strive for greatness.  Encourage them not to live by the labels that others put upon them, but by the greatness within.  Help to shape a world of future leaders by doing something so simple, use care in choosing your words and how you label your children.

How to survive an argument

Every relationship has its up and downs, highs and lows. There are times when all is sugar and spice. There are also those moments that make you want to pack up your bandana and run away like a kid.

Those “run away” moments, are the times that test your existence as a wife.  Those challenging moments can make or break both you and the relationship.  While it may seem like you’re alone, this relationship struggle is not unique.   Somehow you have to find a way to muddle through; after all you’re a mom with a child-sized audience watching your every move. How do you do it?  How do you find your footing when faced with the argument to end all arguments?

- Never argue in front of the kids. Kids have a hard enough time just being kids.  Watching their parents engage in verbally (and hopefully, definitely not physical) warfare can rattle any child’s world. Parents are the rock that kids lean on so what happens when the rock falters? You raise kids who never learn the value of a relationship or feel the security of home.  Save the battle for another location away from prying eyes or listening ears.

- Never continuously threaten to leave. Sure, a lot is said in the heat of the battle, but constantly threatening to leave may get you the exit ticket you didn’t really bargain for.  In the midst of the argument, you may mean it with every fiber of your being, but just as sure as day settles into night, you may find that you really didn’t mean it. Your spouse, however, may have heard it one to many times and decide to take you up on your offer.

- Don’t give as good as you get.  This is a hard one.  Sure, while your mate is flinging insults and accusations in your direction, you may be tempted to hurl those javelins right back.  Remember, once it’s said – you can’t take it back.  Try to be the “bigger” person and “rise” above.  Sure, they will do their best to goad you into a reaction.  Remember, sometimes the best reaction – is not reaction at all.

Life documents your child will need in college

A recent scare with one of my children while they were in the process of completing their paperwork for a new job, brought up the very important question. What documents does a young adult need while attending college?

1 - Social Security card - If your young adult needs their Social Security Card, by all means give it to them, but only if they absolutely have to have it. Otherwise keep the card in a safe place in your home. Losing a social security card is the same as inviting identify theft. The good news is that while they should have the number memorized, they actually don’t need the actual card until they they are hired for a job. Never carry your Social Security card in your wallet.

2 - Driver’s License / Learner’s Permit - Never underestimate the power of identification. I learned this recently when I lost my own Driver’s License. Why do you need a state issued picture ID? To go the bank, use a credit card, basically every time you need to prove who you are, which I’ve found is quite often.

Other important documents of note:
-Birth Certificate
-Childhood shot record

Lose just one document and it’s amazing how difficult life can suddenly become. Even experienced adults panic at the thought of losing an important document. Help your young adult safeguard their life and teach them the value of life documents.

Working for an Allowance

While it seems that kids have everything handed to them these days, there was a time when games and toys were earned by way of an allowance. For those that are unfamiliar with the term, it generally means money given to kids so they can purchase their own extra items - whether for toys, candy or other item their heart desires.  Allowance should not be given freely; however, there should be some aspect of work involved for the child to gain a greater understanding and appreciation of money.  What can a child can do to earn allowance?  Here are some tried and true tips.

Help to clean the kitchen. They don’t need to clean the entire kitchen, but they can help to wash or put away the dishes, sweep the floor or take out the trash.  Once the work is complete, spot check to make sure that it’s done correctly.  This is an excellent way for children to learn that they need to keep not only their room clean, but help to clean the rest of the family living areas. 

Have them help with the laundry.  Many children over the age of 12 should be able to help with the laundry.  Even if you don’t feel comfortable with them working the washing machine, they can certainly take all of their clothes to the laundry room.  Once the clothes are washed, they can fold the clothes and put them away. 

Laundry isn’t just for teenagers.  Even those as young as pre-school age can get into the fun.  Have them help to sort the laundry by colors.  Place all the red clothes in this pile, all the white clothes in that pile.  They learn how to not only separate laundry, but they also learn their colors.  If you’re working with a preschooler, you may not want to give them their allowance just yet; put the money in a piggy bank for safe keeping until they are ready.

Clean up around the yard.  They may be too young to run a lawn mower, but they can certainly pick up twigs, rake leaves or even pull weeds out of the flower garden.  If they are old enough, you may want to consider teaching them lawn mower safety and then supervise while they mow a section of the yard. 

Providing chores for your child to accomplish enables them to develop a sense of responsibility and learn valuable life skills, while earning money at the same time.  Your kids will also have the joy of having their own pocket change to save or spend.

Earning allowance is a privilege that will help your child to appreciate the value of money and the importance of helping the family.

What I learned at Disney World as a mom

An adult learning lessons at Disney World?  Sounds preposterous?  But it can definitely happen.  One day my sisters and I decided to ditch the husbands and the kids to go on a trip to the “happiest places on the earth” – Disney World during the Princess Marathon Weekend.  While the word "ditch" may sound cold, it can sometimes become a matter of survival for an overworked, over-stressed, well-deserving mom.

Our parents had taken us to Disney World many times when we were kids.  As we grew older, we often treated our families to large family reunion style weekends at the House of Mouse.   After many years, we decided it was finally time to treat ourselves to the place that we loved as kids and secretly adored as adults.  It was time to celebrate our sisterhood and what better place than Disney World.

After months of endless, and probably mostly unnecessary, planning – we arrived at our Disney World vacation.  Of course, we each participated in the princess marathon in our own individual way.  Our oldest sister ran the half marathon.  The youngest volunteered, and I became part of the CheerSquad. 

The greatest moments of the weekend were the four days we spent running around Disney Parks just like we were kids.  Imagine the joy of eating what and when you wanted to.  Imagine not having to worry about getting back to a hotel room for naps, or sporting events or video game breaks.  In fact, we walked so much by the end of the weekend, we couldn’t walk another step.  Our desire to engage every second of every day hampered only by the slight limitation that we while the spirit was willing, the body did need a little bit of rest at our ages.

I learned to love “thrill rides” Disney style – The Tower of Terror, the Rocking Roller Coaster –what a blast.  It’s different being able to show the fear in front of your sisters, that you’re never quite comfortable showing in front of your kids.

I learned that going on vacation and bonding with my sisters is a wonderful time of relaxation and reconnecting – so much so that we decided to make Disney Princess Weekend a yearly event.  Does that mean we intend to run in the half marathon?  Probably not, though I might try the 5K, but the time that I get to spend with my sisters will make it a weekend, which will be forever etched in our memories.

For more information on Disney World Sport Events:

Disney World of Sports